“There is nothing better on this earth than a soul you can connect with on every level.”
- Author Unknown -
(continuing from last time...)
He had found me and sent me a smile. So I smiled right back. And later that evening I received an email with the subject line “Crayons are in the mail”. It started off like this:
“Thanks for the smile. You made my day! Really loved your profile. You hit the nail right on the head (and adorable to boot)...”
And had this image attached to it, which made me laugh out loud:
|You have to have read this post to understand why this is funny.|
I fired off an email in return and received another one from him the next day. So I sent one more. Then he did. And for the next few days we were exchanging emails back and forth regularly; silly, uplifting and playful emails that had us both laughing out loud and looking forward to the next one. In less than a week he gave me his number and I called him; adding a voice to the words and all the photos we shared. And every night, after I put the kids to bed, we ended our day on the phone together sharing stories, laughing heartily, learning about one another and becoming closer. We were pleasantly surprised at how similar we were right down to our upbeat personalities and wacky senses of humour.
Things moved very quickly between us with those emails and phone calls, and we connected at a level and speed that was both wonderful and frightening. I had sworn I was going to be cautious and take it very slow and yet I didn’t care to honour it with this man. Everything about him was so comfortable...and familiar. It felt like we were catching up rather than just getting started. But no matter how much we were enjoying this period and how fond we had become of one other, it was still just a virtual connection. We hadn’t met face to face and there was always the possibility that once we did, the chemistry wouldn’t be there, as sometimes happens.
In one email he joked:
So, wanna meet? (Notice how skillfully I fit that in here?) Nothing stressful, just for a coffee or something. I really would like to check this out in real-time (and not be limited to my two-finger typing technique). You know, just a chance to see the look in your eyes, hear your voice, savor your sweet fragrance… sweep you off your feet in a crushing embrace, our hearts beating faster and faster...whoa boy! Easy now! Whoa! Good boy!
Well maybe we shouldn’t sit too close together. Seriously? I promise to be a perfect gentleman. Anyway, give it some thought and let me know.
And since I always kept pace with his silliness, something he enjoyed, I wrote back:
Smooth question...very smooth. In fact so smooth that it bypassed me completely when I read your email this afternoon as I snuck onto the site while my co-workers looked the other way. And while I was at the market after work, in the bread section, minding my own business in deep thought about the ecological issues of this world...alllll of a sudden WHAM, I got this sudden mental flashback like a big lightning bolt, not a light bulb mind you (the type of insight someone who spent years taking drugs would get...theoretically speaking of course...not that I would know anything about such things :)
And I stopped dead in my tracks (causing other people to collide behind me) and saw the whoooole sentence before me like a revelation “So, wanna meet?” (Such depth in those words...how could I have bypassed it) And I thought “Could it be? Is it so?” How did such a thing come to be and I missed it? Was it the blinding sun through the window (even though I have no window near me at work)? Could it have been the excess caffeine that I abused my body with throughout the day that escalated my senses causing me only to read every second line on the email? Could it be a conspiracy where as [name of dating site] encrypted sentences that contained words like: meet, coffee, real world…? Was it a deep seated Freudian childhood experience that caused me to psychologically suppress words and sentences deep into my subconscious from the inability to face them?
So I waited until my children went to bed, pooled all the courage from inside me and did the unthinkable. I pressed the button with a trembling finger and I logged on! And alas and behold, there it was. It was not my imagination, a hallucination or a mirage (not this time).
So I sit here in astonishment and bewilderment at the big question before me and my educated, intellectual and well thought out response is:
To which he answered:
“Ok, now I'm getting really, really worried. I'm starting to have serious doubts that one of my multiple personalities, is stepping out without my knowledge. He's managed get my credit card info, logon to [name of dating site], set up your phony id, with the sole purpose of screwing with my mind...”
This is the type of fun we would have with our emails. Phone calls, too. And it was incredible. But the question "So, wanna meet?" had been put out there and the time had come to take this connection to the next level. Meet in person. See if we clicked that way. There was a possibility that all this would come to an end if the chemistry just wasn't there in real time but it was a risk we had to take. Because we had to know either way.
So we made plans to meet in the afternoon on Saturday, May 18, 2002. A day that is etched in my mind forever.
To be continued... (click here)