I don't. This doesn't mean I forget, it just means that I don't want to be an emotional hostage to someone who has wronged me or to some experience that is painful. Plus, I don't want to carry around baggage from the past that interferes with the present.
How about you?
I don't forget but I don't think I hold grudges. I sure never forget.
ReplyDeleteThat is sensible, Christine. Remembering keeps us from getting burned again, but not holding a grudge releases us from emotional prison.
DeleteThere was a big old typo in that comment, here's the corrected version, I'm too pragmatic to hold grudges, but the pain, hurt, disappointment felt seems to never go away. So, try as I might, I can't forget and things are never the same with that particular individual. It's sort of like when you hammer a nail into the wall. You can pull the nail out, but the hole is still there.
ReplyDeleteMakes total sense. A relationship can be damaged when trust is compromised.
DeleteFunny you should have this question today. I was having a tough morning with myself feeling a bit down about something a family member had not done that I thought they should have done. I don't exactly hold grudges, but I can allow bitterness to get the hold of me sometime. Got to learn to let go of some of that and not necessarily forget but not let it ruin my days at times.
ReplyDeletebetty
It can be tough when someone disappoints us, Betty. That's very human! I hope you are feeling much better now :)
DeleteI typically do not forgive without merit, unfortunately.
ReplyDeleteVery typical of many people!
DeleteI try not to hold grudges but sometimes I do not succeed.
ReplyDeleteIt's not always easy to let go.
DeleteHmmmmm. I carry a bit of a grudge against my ex-husband, but it's nothing compared to the anger I used to feel.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Janie
Sounds like you are moving along, Janie! He really isn't worth the energy, is he? I have an ex and refuse to invest any emotional energy on him. He just isn't worth it.
DeleteI don't hold grudges. My methods of handling unpleasant situations is to either forget or go on with the person as if nothing happened. They know what the score is.
ReplyDeleteSounds like a good strategy. Investing energy in negativity is too exhausting. Sometimes it's best to just move on.
DeleteI don't hold them either but if someone has done me real wrong, I don't
ReplyDeleteforget either and depending on the situation, I often remove them from my life.
You know, when it's needed, kinda thing.
I totally get you. I've removed people from my life when necessary. I don't need toxicity in my circle. I don't hold grudges or seek revenge, but I don't have to have a relationship with everyone either.
DeleteNo, I do not hold grudges. If someone wrongs me, that is something THEY will have to live with.
ReplyDeleteThat's a good philosophy, Kay! The burden is theirs!
DeleteI don't forget either, but to me that's very close to holding a grudge! If I have reason to mistrust someone, I keep them at arm's length.
ReplyDeleteBetter safe than sorry! Some people are just too toxic to have around.
DeleteMy sentiments exactly, Martha!! I will NEVER forget a wrong done to me or to someone I love. I make 'adjustments' to that relationship that works best for me. It has worked well for me especially with family members.....I keep it civil but that is it.
ReplyDeleteWe're on the same page, Jim. Keeping a safe distance is often necessary, especially with people that are very toxic and bring along more drama than we need. I like a quiet life, so if someone is disrupting that, I keep them at arm's length.
DeleteNo, just generally remove the offending party from my everyday life.
ReplyDeleteGood stuff. My way of doing things!
DeleteHey Martha,
ReplyDeleteHow's it goin', eh?
I never hold a grudge because it creates negative energy.
Gary
Smart thinking, Gary! And who wants negative energy around? I hope you are doing well!
DeleteI have read holding a grudge is like picking up a hot coal to throw at the person you are mad at , but you just burn yourself.
ReplyDeleteOh, I never heard this before! What a great way to describe it :)
DeleteNo, it's just too negative!
ReplyDeleteYou have to move on ...
All the best Jan
Wise words, Jan! I wish you a lovely weekend :)
DeleteNot really - when I was younger it was harder to let them go but then I thought "in the light of all eternity" why would I walk around like that.
ReplyDeleteI thank many of us change as we get older. We realize life is too short to carry around that type of baggage!
DeleteBefore i used to sit and think why these things happened. But now a days take the life as it comes. Trying to enjoy each and every moment which will not come again in our life...
ReplyDeleteThat is a great philosophy to live by. Just be in the moment and enjoy life.
DeleteI don't think I do. I definitely NEVER FORGET what people say and do to me, and I don't forgive either, I just move on, if possible, and have nothing to do with them.
ReplyDeleteI can relate. I don't want to waste any more energy than necessary on someone who has faulted me. I don't forget but I don't carry around baggage with me.
DeleteSorry to see comments turned off for your next post. Cute Cartoon, hope you're feeling better soon.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Sandy. I'm feeling better!
DeleteI know you've turned your comments off on your next (newer) post but I just wanted to send my good wishes.
ReplyDeleteFeel better soon …
All the best Jan
Thank you so much, Jan! I really appreciate your kindness. I'm feeling better. I'll get back to blogging as soon as I can. In the meantime, I hope you are doing well.
DeleteI try not too, I,ve had the flue from Oct 17 to April 18, you have my sympathies and a whole lot of prayers. For some reason I can only blog through google what's up with that?
ReplyDeleteHey, Lorraine! So nice to hear from you. Thank you for your good wishes. I hope you are feeling much better!
DeleteSince comments have been turned off on the two most recent posts. I'll leave my comment here. Sorry you were sick, hope you feel better soon. I'll have to look around to see what or where you other blogs are.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Sandy! I am much better now. I just need to take a break from this blog for awhile and concentrate on other things. I am also considering changing this one a little. Not sure how yet but I'm working on it!
DeleteThank you for the visit. Hope you're feeling better.
ReplyDeleteI am feeling good. Thank you, Sandy!
Delete